Transcription: Mayor Talbot's Address.. (cont)

Transcription: Mayor Talbot's Address to the Colony of Underton, 12/16/2026

Talbot: Greetings friends and neighbors. I'd like to personally thank you, those who have made it, for attending today's address. I know that morale has certainly dropped recently, and while I do not blame those who are not present, I'll have to admit I'm a little disappointed at the turn out. We are certainly not the biggest colony, which allows us to be the closely knit community we are. Refusing to participate in our government just (clears throat) flies in the face of all we stand for. Just because you may disagree with some of my um, policies in the past.
(Several crowd members speak out of earshot)
Talbot: Uh, this is not what I am hear to talk about. My actions regarding the opening of the latch were in the colonies best interest, I refuse to apologize just because some people are overly sensitive about radiation.
(crowd becomes louder)
Talbot: But this is- But this is not what I am hear to talk about. I am hear to address on of the most important issues plaguing our community: Unhealthy weight gain. It is absolutely key to ones well-being to keep a trim build and a healthy, low-fat diet. Thusly, I have taken it on myself to provide us with a 7-step program to help our entire community beat the scourge of weight gain.
Firstly, everyone must eat more vegetables. Green vegetables are important, you don't have to be a medical man to know that. I know our hydroponics program has not been the most successful, some may say it was "counter-productive" in using up all of our water, but we did yield several potatoes this year, and those are plenty green. Faintly glowing, but green.
Secondly, get some exercise! Digging new tunnels to expand our community is a great way to burn some calories and serve your community.
Thirdly, get some fresh air. One can only take so much of this stuffy ol' place, and I'm sure it had some health benefits to breath fresh, surface air. If you are not one of those people who find radiation offensive, of course.
(angry shouts) 
Talbot: I'm not saying anything against the more, em, sensitive members of our community, and I'm no scientist, but I doubt seeing the sun for a change can do you much harm.
Crowd member: Yes it can!
Talbot: Eh-hem, I mean, the only way to know is to try it out-
Crowd member: No, it isn't!
Crowd member: Get off of the stage!
Talbot: I really think we are over reacting, I had only had the best in mind for our community, we have to make sacrifices if we ever want to-
(Talbot cannot be heard over crowd. Several people begin to throw rocks and he is forced to leave to stage.)